This time I’m not sticking my foot in my mouth
I’ve had trouble with my feet all my life. In fact, I got off on the wrong foot at an early age when I started playing sports — I seemed to favor my left foot, instead of my right. So in kickball, football, soccer and even golf — I always advanced the ball with my left foot.
As a teenager I was really good at putting my foot in my mouth. Actually, it was my mouth that did most of the damage, but I somehow always recovered.
When I was of courting age (around 12) I started sweeping girls off their feet, mostly because I always put my best foot forward.
Somehow I survived the adolescent years and went off to college, where (You can see this coming.) I had professors that really put their foot down hard on me. But that only made me stronger. When I embarked on my career as a writer, I got off ...